As Leaders we have a responsibility to create a safe environment for people to show up to and work in, and this includes the ability to voice opinions and concerns, and thinking without fear of judgement, negative impacts or treatment as a result.
Consistency & Openness to Feedback:
Actively seeking feedback in respect to leadership style and response is key and (in my humble opinion) two of the most underrated leadership attributes.
How often have you experienced a leader or colleague at work who is a little like Jekyl and Hyde?
One day they are calm and considered and the next flying off the handle and on the attack. This dynamic, coupled with someone who is not willing to receive feedback or to be questioned about their thinking and approach, typically creates an environment of fear and anxiety. Where others around them shut down or tune off and do not speak up as a result and then leading to a vicious cycle where the person believes they are in the right and therefore unchallenged.
Have you perhaps attempted to challenge or provide feedback to an individual like this and what was the result?
Typically these individuals, who present as overtly confident, outspoken and command the room, will also go on the immediate defensive when challenged openly, or where there is an attempt to provide constructive feedback. Believing that they are in the right and possibly because they create an energy that prevents the vast majority of people from challenging or questioning them in any facet and they will have this down to a fine art.
So how do you engage/ challenge/ manage-up, with an individual who is presenting in this manner?
1. Attempt to seek understanding around what is driving this behaviour. This is typically linked to a level of insecurity and knowledge deficit and may be related to feelings of imposter syndrome, presenting as defensiveness around receiving feedback. individual personality attributes and learned behaviour, which is far more challenging.
2.Work to establish a base level of trust first and foremost and find some common ground, try to see where their point-of-view comes from.
3. Ask open questions to seek understanding and qualify any feedback or statements with factual examples of behaviour and ensure that feedback is provided in a safe space, with parameters pre-set and ideally one-on-one where there are ongoing issues.
4. Tell them how their behaviour is impacting you and the wider team, with examples, and seek a way you can both make some adjustments and work on how to minimise any negative impacts. Always try to depersonalise this, with the use of factual examples and do so respectfully and with empathy.
5. If need be – engage help to manage toxic behaviours, specifically if this is with your direct leader, to gain advice and support in managing this as this may be bigger than you, and need further intervention.